From a societal point of view, and for several reasons, MILF mansion is a deeply agonizing series. Are we all going to sit back and watch a series that seems to have tricked a group of guys in their twenties and their mothers into showing up on an island to hang out with? If the world of reality TV has taught me anything, it’s that the answer is definitely “Yes, absolutely, yes.” But are we also will he sit idly by and leave this misuse of the term “MILF”?
MILF Mansion—a reality nightmare from TLC – is a dating retreat in which a group of guys and their mothers show up unwittingly. Meaning: so-called “MILFs” are out to date guys their sons’ age in front of their sons, and vice versa. But are these women really MILFs? Or are they cougars, or jaguars, or pumas?
As Fletcher Peters of The Daily Beast’s Obsessed pointed out in his review, “MILF” is a notorious acronym to describe a mother who is also physically attractive. Cougars, on the other hand, are older women who actively pursue younger men. A MILF may not be interested in guys lusting after her, and cougaring is a state of mind more than anything else.
If we really wanna break it down, though, MILF mansion made an even bigger mistake by using “cougar” to describe women of all ages who date younger men. This violates the feline scale, which, as noted by Urban Dictionary, divides women who pursue younger men into categories grouped by decade. “Cougar” describes women in their forties; the “jaguars” are in their fifties and the “pumas” in their thirties. Imagine if we had such advanced vocabularies to describe the specific types of men who pursue younger women!
Cougars Seek Love With Their Sons In Ridiculous “MILF Manor”
It’s hard to imagine how anyone could confuse these two terms, both of which have such a rich cultural history. Does anyone remember when John Cho, years before his stardom, appeared in American pie explain what makes a MILF? His character, literally called “MILF Guy #2”, informs us that a MILF, as illustrated by Jennifer Coolidge as Stifler’s mother, is a “MILF – mom I’d like to fuck”.
And who could forget Cougar Town—the Courteney Cox comedy whose title turned out to be a major turning point for some would-be viewers? In 2011, Cox said Harper’s Bazaar that the term “cougar” did not offend him. A year later, she told Anderson Cooper that she thought the title was a mistake nonetheless. “We started to be Cougar City because it was a good way to shock people with the title. She said the name also referred to her son’s football team on the show, but ultimately, she added, it was “a mistake, you know. Sometimes we make mistakes.
In a Friends– related twist of irony, pop culture obsessives might recall that Cox’s girlfriend, Jennifer Aniston, also got embroiled in the cougar-MILF-puma talk.
Shortly after Cox began producing and starring in Cougar CityAniston signed for cougars– a romantic comedy in which two women in their thirties “get into the habit of seducing younger men” and embark on “a ski vacation in France that defies their romantic expectations”, The variety reported (by MTV News) in 2009. Around the same time, Weekly entertainment asked, “Isn’t Jennifer Aniston better than this?” (It was also the year Mike Fleiss debuted The Puma– a reality series about people in their twenties dating a 40-year-old woman that ran for one season on TV Land.)
‘Boring’ bachelor kisses 8 women at premiere, sends 1 home early
As MTV News noted in its article on cougars– a project that seems never to have materialized – the “cougar” discussion had become obsolete by this point. But then, in 2010, Demi Moore swooped in – who turned the dialectical table upside down by declaring herself a cougar when she was in her 40s, when she married Ashton Kutcher.
“Cougar got so obnoxious,” Moore said Harper’s Bazaar in March (via CBS News). “I really hate that expression.” She said she preferred the term ‘puma’ because it “has a softer, more elegant quality to it.
“And then someone said to me, ‘Cougars are for people in their thirties. “”
Undeterred, Moore told the magazine that she ranks as a “cougar” anyway. And why wouldn’t she be? Whether MILF mansion taught us something is that labels are flexible, especially when another term better suits your brand.
Keep obsessing! Sign up for the Daily Beast’s Obsessed newsletter and follow us on Facebook, Twitter, instagram and ICT Tac.
Learn more about The Daily Beast.
Get the Daily Beast’s biggest scoops and scandals straight to your inbox. Register now.
Stay informed and get unlimited access to The Daily Beast’s unrivaled reports. Subscribe now.